Oh yeah, things are getting crazy this Tabletop Tuesday! We’re taking a quiz.
If you’ve ever played Dungeons and Dragons, then you know about alignment. It’s a quick evaluation of your character’s worldview and personality, a form of labeling that allows everybody to be categorized according to nine possible combinations. But why leave profiling to the tabletop games, huh? We’re going on the road and making generalized stereotypes for everybody!
Here’s how the quiz will work. There are two sections: Lawful or Chaotic, and Good or Evil. Each question within a section will have two options: a “dungeon” option or a “dragon” option (I was gonna do left or right, but that implies one side is more correct than the other). At the end of each section you’ll grade yourself to find out your alignment. Once you’ve finished both sections, you just shove the answers together and BAM, you’ve got your alignment. At the end I’ll include some descriptions of what each alignment is like so you’ll know exactly how to act in accordance with your beliefs and worldview.
Section One: Lawful or Chaotic
1.) Your friend Marco is having some hard times financially and is struggling to feed his family. Meanwhile, your boss at work is throwing crazy parties every weekend, blowing money left and right. One day at work you stumble onto an opportunity to steal some money from your boss. What do you do?
Dungeons: Don’t steal the money. You’ll find a legal way to help Marco.
Dragons: Take the money. Marco needs it more than your boss.
2.) You promised your mom that you would go grocery shopping with her when she gets home from work so you can reach the items on the tall shelves for her. Then when your dad gets home, he offers to take you out to a super cool movie that just came out. But if you go to the movie, you’ll be gone when your mom gets home. What do you do?
Dungeons: A promise is a promise. I’ll have to see the movie some other time.
Dragons: I shouldn’t be obligated to do something I don’t want to. Movie time!
3.) You and a group of friends are forming your school’s first ever underwater basketweaving team. While filling out the application to be recognized as a legitimate organization, you come upon the section about leadership. You can choose to either vote democratically on every issue, or to appoint a leader who will make the group’s decisions. What do you do?
Dungeons: Appoint a leader. It’s more organized when one person calls the shots.
Dragons: Vote democratically. That’s the fairest way for everybody.
4.) You’re wandering the outskirts of town one day when you find a beautiful doe in a cage. She seems sad and wants to be out in the open. However, you look up and realize that this is a restaurant that serves venison, and she’s probably supposed to be someone’s meal. What do you do?
Dungeons: Let her be eaten. That’s the natural order of things.
Dragons: Let her go. Everyone and everything deserves to be free.
Grading
If you selected mostly Dungeons, you are Lawful. You believe in that order is most important, that following the laws and keeping promises is how society stays organized and civilized.
If you selected mostly Dragons, you are Chaotic. You believe that freedom is most important, that everyone should get to live their life their way and make their own decisions.
If you tied, you are Neutral. You just go with the flow or do whatever makes the most sense in the moment. Or perhaps you believe that both too much order and too much freedom are bad things.
Section Two: Good or Evil
1.) You’re walking down the street and you see a man crossing the road. Another man is in his car talking on a cell phone. The driving man does not notice the walking man and is about to hit him. You could push the walking man out of the way, but would probably get hit yourself. What do you do?
Dungeons: Saving him is the right thing to do, even if I get hurt.
Dragons: I don’t jump in the way. I’ll try to warn him, but risking myself is silly.
2.) You drive up to the drive-thru window of McDonald’s having just ordered a small drink. The cashier informs you that the person in front of you paid for your drink, and she asks if you’d like to continue the trend and pay for the person behind you. You notice there are at least five people in their car. What do you do?
Dungeons: Pay for them. Someone paid for me, and it’s a nice gesture.
Dragons: Don’t pay for them. Their order is bigger than mine, it isn’t reasonable.
3.) You and your brother are in a massive line for an amusement park ride. You’ve been standing around for half an hour already, and it’ll probably be another half-hour before you get to the ride. Suddenly, a friend of yours much farther up the line notices you and motions for you to come forward. Your brother won’t come up – he feels like it’s wrong to cut like that. What do you do?
Dungeons: Stay with my brother. He’s family and cutting isn’t fair anyway.
Dragons: Join my friend. I don’t want to wait that long just for a quick ride.
4.) You have a rival at work who is competing with you for a huge promotion. The two of you are equal in talent and have been working with the company an equal number of years. One weekend, you catch your rival outside of work. She’d had a bit too much to drink and is acting a fool. What do you do?
Dungeons: Nothing. Her out-of-work behavior shouldn’t affect the promotion.
Dragons: Take pictures. Making her look irresponsible will help me get promoted.
Grading
If you selected mostly Dungeons, you are Good. You believe in putting others before yourself, even when that means things are going to be more inconvenient for you.
If you selected mostly Dragons, you are Evil. You believe in putting yourself first, because focusing that much on other people will just make your life more difficult. They can take care of themselves.
If you tied, you are Neutral. You’ll be nice if it isn’t too crazy, but sometimes you have to look out for number one. Or maybe you believe that too much devotion to either good or evil is dangerous.
Alignments
Now that you’ve completed both sections, let’s look at what the alignments mean when they’re smashed up together!
Lawful Good: You believe in orderly, selfless conduct. The world works best when society is organized and people look out for each other.
Lawful Neutral: Society has rules for a reason. Those rules shouldn’t acknowledge “good” or “bad,” just what’s ethical and keeps the world running.
Lawful Evil: You’ve gotta do what’s best for yourself, but that doesn’t mean breaking the rules. Rules are there to protect you, so follow them and keep your head down and you’ll be fine.
Neutral Good: Whether something is lawful or not doesn’t matter; as long as it’s motivated by selflessness, then it’s a good thing.
True Neutral: The world needs a balance of order, freedom, good, and evil. Swinging too hard one direction is where extremism comes from, and that’s dangerous.
Neutral Evil: You’ll follow the rules – or not – based on what they can do for you. Yeah, breaking the law is “bad,” but if the law is hurting you, then that’s what is actually bad.
Chaotic Good: In a world where everyone acts in the best interest of others, rules are unnecessary. Everyone should be free to make their own choices as long as those choices are in the best interest of everybody.
Chaotic Neutral: You just want to mind your own business and be free to do what you want, with nobody there to tell you what the “right” or “wrong” thing is.
Chaotic Evil: Chaos is the true order. The natural way of things is for people to be free to do what they want and focus on their own interests, not anybody else’s. Anarchy is the way to go.
So where did you fall on the axis? Discuss it in the comments and let me know if you feel like your alignment makes sense for you. Also, let me know if you’d like to see more quizzes in the future. If you all enjoy taking a quiz every now and again, Adventure Rules might incorporate them more often!
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